"I'm a monstrous creature with the audacity to compete with G-d (affectionate)."

Hello, dear Reader!

Now that you’ve hopefully read the fic (And Cry Like “L’Chaim”; Hallelujah), behind the cut you’ll find my thoughts about the-making-of. All tags for the fic are fair game to be discussed. Please note that I am talking about my own experiences and my own research-- I don’t claim to be an expert or the one true arbiter of religion/spirituality. (And not one of our beloved show, either.) This meta also assumes that you've seen pretty much all TS episodes. If there's anything I've missed you'd like to ask about, please feel free.

Without further ado...

(Relevant tags reminder: suicidiality, Character in peril, Mental Breakdown, Whump, Angst with a Hopeful Ending, Soul Bond, Spirit walk, Grief/Mourning, Shaman!Blair, Jewish!Blair, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Episode: s04e01 Sentinel Too Part 2, Episode: s04e08 The Sentinel by Blair Sandburg)

( Or, a meta on “The Sentinel” canon, Judaism, grief, and how sometimes we don’t write the story we want, but the story we need. )

It's been about five weeks since I logged into tumblr for the last time, and I'll be honest-- it's been the best five weeks I've spent in fandom so far. I do genuinely miss all the interaction with all the lovely anons that visited me; I wish life would have worked out differently so that I could have been available for longer. But-- and I don't say this lightly-- tumblr as a whole is like an abusive relationship. When it's good, it's easy to pretend everything's okay and that the good can last... and when it's bad, it is soul-crushing and horrifyingly bad. (Just how much tumblr and general tumblr mob mentality is a pretty spot on parallel is a post for another day.)

Things are a lot quieter than they used to be, but I'm happy with where I'm at in fandom. I can't remember the last time I said that. :)